Weekend Writing Warriors – 5/31/14

wewriwa_square_2Welcome to Snippet Sunday and Weekend Writing Warriors! For those new to this, fellow writers post eight sentences from one of our works. I’ve been revising my New Adult steampunk romance, STEAM ME UP RAWLEY, so I thought I’d share. Someone last week asked if the monkey (Loki) was still in the story, and indeed he is, so I thought I’d share some trouble he got up to at the end of the first scene (he normally sits on her shoulder):

“The punch,” someone cried nearby.
Adele spun around, the lack of weight on her shoulder filling her with unease.
Loki sat in the crystal punchbowl, splashing the too-pink liquid in his face and scattering large dollops on the starched white linen tablecloth. From across the expansive lawn, Claire screeched.
That screech punched through Adele’s belly, hollowing it out. Criminy. The party seemed populated now with just eyes, judging, condescending, see-what-a-joke-you-are eyes, all pointed at her.
And that screech felt as if it arrowed straight to her boss across town.

I welcome all comments, even constructive crits. I also found out this past week that this story was a finalist in the paranormal category in Virginia’s Fool For Love contest.

This week my aunt and cousin, who form the writing duo Ursula LeCoeur, are participating in WeWriWa! Please stop by to give them a newcomers’ welcome!

To join in the fun and see the other wonderful writers, go to Weekend Writing Warriors! Thanks for stopping by!

18 Replies to “Weekend Writing Warriors – 5/31/14”

  1. That snippet is so visual, Angela. The “too pink liquid” on the “starched white linen tablecloth” just pops! Loki is such a devilish little fellow. 🙂 Congrats on being a finalist! I didn’t write a wewriwa post this week. Just out visiting. 🙂

  2. I can hear Aladdin’s voice from the Disney film saying “I’m in trouble!” Great snippet, Angela. I can feel her dismay and chagrin.

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