Today is #sixsunday where writers share six sentences from their work. I’ll share a snippet from my time-travel romance WIP tentatively titled MUST LOVE BREECHES.

Here’s my new pitch/logline: When a thoroughly modern girl finds herself stranded in 1834 London, she must find a way home while navigating the pitfalls of London society, resisting her attraction to a hunky lord, and ultimately having to decide when her true home lies.  (You can see the other entries here.)

I got a request to have this week’s six feature the hero, Lord Montagu, and so I thought I’d share this snippet I wrote recently to add into Chapter One. I’d realized I needed to have him be a little more sympathetic and “heroic” because up until now, the reader only knows he has a bad reputation and is known as “the Vicious Viscount.” So in this new addition, he’s just been given a cut direct and has realized that his self-inflicted reputation is no longer working to enact “his plans” — he’s returning with food to Isabelle (whom he just met and danced with) and along the way sees a ‘young lady’ of ‘remarkable intelligence’ but with a ‘shy nature.’ Here’s what he does:

On a whim, he bowed, eliciting several shocked gasps. The young miss turned white. Excellent. Word would quickly spread and put her in the orbit of the young blades of the ton. Surely some worthy gentleman’s sense of protectiveness would be aroused and he would take notice of her.

Perhaps his reputation still had one noble function.

Does this work? As always I welcome constructive feedback. Thank you!

To see snippets from others who are participating or to sign up yourself, visit here. Other participants writing time travel: Gayle Ramage, Sandra Jones and Maria-Claire Payne

Thank you to everyone who comes by and comments each week! Have a great Sunday!

  1. This totally works for me. It’s a very simple way to elicit our sympathy for this character. When it started out with “on a whim” I was a little concerned that his action would be self-serving but you pulled it off by the last line.

  2. I enjoyed reading this, Angela. From the snippet, it shows the character in a positive light. Though he is known as the viscious viscount, the fact that he would use his title to help her, a wonderful quality. Like someone commented, I love me a bad boy gone good.. 😀 My, it’s been a while since I took part in six sunday. I just caught up with the other entries you did before. And I’m enjoying myself. A wonderful story. :)

  3. Monica Enderle Pierce

    I like how self-conscious he is. You know I love a rake with a little bit of good in him. I suspect the viscount may even surprise himself by the end.

  4. Excellent six! What I liked particularly about this interaction was how it demonstrated the way the everyone was observing his every move, and as we were discussing a few weeks back, the power of a simple bow in this kind of social setting back then.

    • Don’t blame you for reading that one first :) I’ve been going every year since 2005. I used to run the Atlanta Browncoats if that helps place me–we put on the Wash Wake in 2006 (I think that was the year…) and had Alan Tudyk read his character’s eulogy up in the Con Suite… I have a different last name than this one, though. It’s possible we met…

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