Today is #sixsunday where writers share six sentences from their work. I’ll share a snippet from my time-travel romance WIP tentatively titled MUST LOVE BREECHES. I will be returning from the FF&P Fantasy on the Bayou Conference on Sunday, so will be a little later in the day visiting everyone. UPDATE: Just found out I finaled in the WRWDC Chapter’s Marlene Contest in the paranormal category!
Here’s my new pitch/logline: When a thoroughly modern girl finds herself stranded in 1834 London, she must find a way home while navigating the pitfalls of London society, resisting her attraction to a hunky lord, and ultimately having to decide when her true home lies. (You can see the other entries here.)
This is from Isabelle’s POV, and she and Lord Montagu are in a curricle (a type of carriage) heading to Hyde Park. She’s only been back in time for two days and he’s just called on her to ask her to go on this ride with him:
Twenty minutes later, Isabelle clutched the edge of her seat as Lord Montagu’s curricle rattled alongside all the other stylish carriages that crammed Rotten Row in Hyde Park. Elegantly dressed women mingled along the lane strolling, or talking in small groups; men and women trotted on horses; and, to Isabelle’s astonishment, tradespeople and servants lined the edges here and there, staring and pointing. It was as if the promenaders formed a parade for the less fortunate to gawk at. And the way the promenaders behaved—strutting, gossiping with others they met on their amble—it reminded Isabelle of the practice of cruising with cars that used to be popular. She stifled a giggle when they passed a group of garishly dressed men in their early twenties—real live fops! They looked pleased with themselves.
As always I welcome constructive feedback. Thank you!
To see snippets from others who are participating or to sign up yourself, visit here. Other participants writing time travel: Gayle Ramage, Sandra Jones and Maria-Claire Payne
Thank you to everyone who comes by and comments each week! Have a great Sunday!
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Jennifer Lowery
/ March 4, 2012Fun voice in your six! Very nice! Love the title, too!
Lisa Fox
/ March 4, 2012What a great scene! Very descriptive.
Cera duBois
/ March 4, 2012Great six, Angela… Loved the description.
Wendy S. Russo
/ March 4, 2012Cruising…sigh. That put me right back in high school.
great six!
DeAnna Felthauser
/ March 4, 2012I loved your description. Great six
Cara Bristol
/ March 4, 2012Enjoyed the description. This sounds like you had a lot of fun writing it. Nice job.
Gem Sivad
/ March 4, 2012I could picture the day, the horses, the fops and the trades people lining the promenade. Well done!
Kate Meader
/ March 4, 2012LOL! Cruising — some things never change! Very fun six.
J.M. Blackman
/ March 4, 2012This is great world-building. The comparison to cruising is great. The amusement lends to the great tone you already provided!
Stephanie
/ March 4, 2012I can see it! And I love how you draw a parallel to a more modern incarnation.
Carly Fall
/ March 4, 2012You packed a lot into those six sentences! Great description!
Joanne Stewart
/ March 4, 2012Love this snippet. This whole book seems like such fun. And I agree–you packed a lot into those sentences. Consider me impressed! Congrats on the final!
Jessica Knauss
/ March 4, 2012Cruising with cars that “used to be” popular — she can;t get her head around any of this, can she? Great snippet!
Carrie-Anne
/ March 4, 2012I loved the description and the narrative voice. This seems like a really fun story.
Sarah W
/ March 4, 2012“Real live fops!” I love this story so, so much. It really brings the period to life!
And . . . am I wrong, or does the Regency era remind anyone else of the nineteeneighties?
sue
/ March 4, 2012That is so cool – parading for the amusement of the lower classes – well they don’t get much of that do they? Yeah it is sort of like when guys would cruise down mainstreet in all their hoped for glory – excellent snippet!
Ruthie
/ March 4, 2012Great scene setting! I like “real live fops!” — I can feel her amusement. I did wonder how the curricle feels. Is it fast, rough? Scary? Or sedate? Her point of comparison would be, what, a carriage ride in Central Park?
angela quarles
/ March 4, 2012That was right before this
will have to do it next Sunday– she compares it to riding in a sports car
Ginger Simpson
/ March 4, 2012Great comparison to modern-day cruising. And congratulations on being a finalist.
Fingers crossed for you.
Paula Martin
/ March 4, 2012Great scene with excellent description.
Siobhan Muir
/ March 4, 2012I liked the description of the past from the future’s eyes. Nicely written six, Angela.
Monica Enderle Pierce
/ March 4, 2012I can see this scene so clearly and love her astonishment at the promenade. Terrific six, Angela!
S. J. Maylee
/ March 4, 2012Of got the scene in my mind!! Very nice, great 6!!
Jean Marie Ward
/ March 4, 2012Lovely description. Bravo! On the Marlenes, too.
Jessica Subject
/ March 4, 2012Amazing how some things never change no matter how many years have past. A great six!
sueannbowlingauthor
/ March 4, 2012Enjoyed the description. By the way, I’m here. Don’t know why my link was removed.
Kelly
/ March 4, 2012Great six! I look forward to next weeks!
Cecilia
/ March 4, 2012Love how you did the descriptions as well. real live fops..lol. brilliant six. Oh ,your book sounds like a blast, Angela.
Babette James
/ March 4, 2012Very fun six and great description. Congrats on the final!
Sandra Sookoo
/ March 4, 2012Nicely described scene
Meg Maguire / Cara McKenna
/ March 4, 2012Ooh, I love time travel stories—especially love having an unfamiliar, bygone era filtered through a modern lens I can relate to. Hope you’ll be posting more from this story in future SSS posts!
Gemma Parkes
/ March 4, 2012Great imagery!
charmaine gordon
/ March 4, 2012You paint a marvelous picture in juxtaposition of what she knows from her own time. Quite good!
sarahballance
/ March 4, 2012It’s so easy to *see* this. Excellent job!
Krystal Wade
/ March 4, 2012I really need to read this. Every excerpt has been amazing!
Corinne Davies
/ March 4, 2012In six sentances you managed to convey a perfect image with your comparison! I love your comparison too
Amy Durham
/ March 4, 2012So descriptive! Loved the comparison to “cruising”! Nice six!
Amy Durham
Kate Warren
/ March 4, 2012Now I want to see some real, live fops!
Jennifer Comeaux
/ March 4, 2012Excellent visuals! I laughed at the fops
Taryn Blackthorne
/ March 4, 2012Cruising comment caught my eye! Lovely Six
A.K. Morgen
/ March 4, 2012I love the scene you’ve painted in here. Great six, Angela, and a huge congratulations on placing!!
Chantel Rhondeau
/ March 5, 2012I love this scene. I can really see what is going on in that park! Terrific job!
gayleramage
/ March 6, 2012Loving the snippet! Marvellous descriptions, too!
(There’s a bit in our village/town called ‘The Row’ but apparently used to be called ‘Rotten Row’ – no wonder they changed the name, lol!)