Six Sentence Sunday – 2/19/12

Today is #sixsunday where writers share six sentences from their work. I’ll share a snippet from my time-travel romance WIP tentatively titled MUST LOVE BREECHES. Today is also in the thick of Mardi Gras here in Mobile, so I will try to make the rounds this morning, but might not be able to return comments until after Fat Tuesday 🙂

Here’s my new pitch/logline: When a thoroughly modern girl finds herself stranded in 1834 London, she must find a way home while navigating the pitfalls of London society, resisting her attraction to a hunky lord, and ultimately having to decide when her true home lies.  (You can see the other entries here.)

I thought I’d pick up exactly where I left off last week, when Isabelle’s friend said a guy was a “breech-ripper.” Seeing the comments, it made me realize I needed to have her react to the term, so here’s my next six:

Isabelle choked on her drink—they’d just been discussing their favorite ‘bodice ripper’ romances. She’d  discovered they shared a mutual obsession with guys in period clothes, which had helped propel her through the early stages of the party. Since this was the first time they’d hung out, she treated this moment delicately, afraid to puncture the mood. To have another friend in London would be wonderful.

A sharp elbow in her side caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass. “Look sharp,” Anna said, her voice low with just a dollop of teasing, “here comes Andrew.”

Does this work? As always I welcome constructive feedback. Thank you!

To see snippets from others who are participating or to sign up yourself, visit here. Another participant writing time travel is Gayle Ramage.

Thank you to everyone who comes by and comments each week! Have a great Sunday!

51 Replies to “Six Sentence Sunday – 2/19/12”

  1. Lovely. I especially enjoyed how you slipped in how lonely she is. One minor point: you repeat “sharp” in that last section – sharp elbow and look sharp. Very evocative six.

  2. And just who does NOT have an obsession with men in period clothes? LOL This sounds like my kind of party. 🙂 Great six! Loved “caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass.”

  3. Hi Angela! So glad you picked up where you left off last Sunday. I adore this: “caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass”. Excellent phrasing. I can tell this is going to be such a cute, romantic story. Great six, and have fun at Mardi Gras! (Lucky girl :D)

  4. I love how you’re setting up Isabelle (and the reader) for her upcoming time travel. Very simple, but skillfully done.

  5. I’m another one who loves the line “caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass” – it fits the romantic theme very well 🙂 Happy Mardi Gras! I used to love parades when I was a kid (I live outside New Orleans) but hardly go to them anymore.

  6. A sharp elbow in her side caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass.

    Love this image! And I like the tagline, too. This book sounds like it’ll be a lot of fun to read.

  7. Love this: A sharp elbow in her side caused her drink to flirt with the rim of her glass. “Look sharp,” Anna said, her voice low with just a dollop of teasing, “here comes Andrew.” It’s a great visual, nicely jarring her out of her mental wandering and I absolutely love the word ‘dollop.’ I think it ties in very nicely with last week’s, and makes the breeches-ripper statement work.

  8. Ditto to what everyone else said. This is such a fun story. 🙂

    (Sorry I’m a little late to the Sunday party, but I was at PantheaCon until this morning–wish I could be where you are, though!)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.